As we sat in the ultra sound room shocked and in disbelief, taking in the news that we would soon be a family of five, I remember distinctly Simeon saying to me was that we would need a new car and that we’d have to move. I immediately agreed.
Our whole life as we knew it was about to become radically altered by two new little lives. My mind started to spin with options – what kind of car should we buy?, where would we move to?, and on and on. But as we settled into the news, we both felt a pang at the thought of leaving our beloved bungalow home.
It’s been a year since we purchased this property and so far we’ve loved living here. The size has been a great blessing–it encourages us to be intentional with our belongings and our time. When we are home we are always within the vicinity of one another and more often than not in the same or adjacent rooms. We appreciate the closeness it creates and the tidy way we must look after ourselves.
It is logical to assume that with five people we’d need a home with at least three bedrooms and more space for little people to play (and big people to escape the chaos). Emphasis on need. What’s a need? Do we need another bedroom? Plenty of people live happy productive lives in two bedroom homes. What if we turned our assumptions inside out and investigated our feelings and fears instead of acting unreflectively?
The longer we sat with the idea of moving, the less inclined we became. It would be a hassle, a huge expense, and add layers of stress and anxiety to an already stressful situation. I started asking myself new questions to re-frame the options and imagine new parameters on our living choices. What would it take to make our home livable for the five of us? What do I love about our home and what, if anything, will the addition of twins change about that? How can we potentially alter the house in the future to make it more functional for a growing family?
These questions opened up spaciousness in the conversation and gave us an opportunity to think about what’s working instead of only the problems. Spoiler alert–we’ve come full circle and have decided that for the time being, we’re going to stay. We really love our little home! And babies are small. We might be able to finish part or all of the basement and add valuable square footage. Financially, to sacrifice now will better secure our future. What’s true is that we are lucky to even consider options when for so many in the world 800 sq ft may feel palatial. We are privileged, and to think, imagine, and plan from that frame of mind helps me to see just how good we have it right now.
So for now, we’re going to make the most of what we have and that means the little ones will be welcomed home to the Bittman Bungalow.